Okay, so we’ve heard the saying, “new year, new me!” It’s echoed all over social media and social settings like your workplace, family gatherings, and a night out with your girlfriends.
You make a list, you check it twice, and at the end of the year, you find out if you’ve been naughty or nice.
Well, personal disclosure, I rang in the New Year like so many curvy gals with a New Year’s resolution to shed some of those pounds. It’s March, and yes, I’ve lost some weight. Notice how I did not mention how many pounds or inches I’ve lost. I don’t think it’s relevant to my journey thus far.
A couple month’s into this plan of attack, I have binged, cheated, been overzealous through starvation and strict juicing, and came to the conclusion that this was a poor choice for a New Year’s resolution.
Don’t get me wrong, I am all for improving one’s health and consulting a nutritionist and physician for those at risk of diabetes, heart disease, or other health risks. That’s why I decided to lose some weight. I’d been scared into dieting and working out by several physicians the past few years due to a family history of heart disease and diabetes.
Alas, my plan of attack was futile. So, I looked further into the source as to why I wanted to lose weight. Well, I want to be healthy and live a long life for my partner and future kids. But, what does healthy mean? And, by whose standards are we measuring this? Doctors? Nutritionists? Family? Friends?
Recently, I’ve been obsessed with curvy fashion blogs and positive body image articles all over social media, and found that you can be healthy at a size 22 just as much as a size 2.
In my quest to fulfill my New Year’s resolution and shed some of those unwanted pounds, I found myself setting unrealistic goals and focusing on a number rather than my health. It’s not healthy to binge eat or starve yourself.
I focused on what one of my physician’s poignantly said to me, “You can have the corn tortilla just in moderation.” As a Mexican American, food is a huge part of my culture. For family gatherings, the food is an event in itself. Mexican rice, charro beans, carne asada, salsa, and fresh homemade flour tortillas, are all tantalizing, and all risky if eaten religiously with no moderation.
So, I revamped myself and started working out slowly, went at my own pace. Also, I started eating in moderation after a juice cleanse and cut out some carbs. I didn’t cut everything out. I decided to keep a cheat day. There’s no way I would have made it thus far without a cheat day.
And, yes, I have fallen off the band wagon. But, the next day, I start over. I have accepted that I’ll veer off from time to time, but I feel great. I’m not perfect, and I do not have a goal in mind to be a certain size or to lose a certain amount of weight.
What I found out is that the change that was most relevant was my attitude, the way I carried myself, and how that reflected on the outside. A classmate of mine pointed out to me one day, “You know there’s something about you, like the way you carry yourself has changed.” And, it’s true. I smile often, I take fashion risks that I normally wouldn’t have, I feel confident, sexy, and I am coming into my own skin. I feel wonderful with my rolls, or as they say in Spanish, lonjas. My stretchmarks are a part of me, my chubby cheeks are cute, one dimple and all. The difference is I own it. Sure, I’ve lost some pounds, some inches, some areas have smoothed out, and my waist is a little smaller, but I’m still curvy and busty. That’s something I never want to lose. I love my big beautiful body.
I love it so much, I decided to take a new venture and have some professional photos taken for a plus size modeling competition and for personal reasons. It was an amazing experience, and something that was not on my New Year’s resolution list. It’s funny how one thing on that list can suddenly transform and render a new life-changing experience. More details to come in a future blog about this new endeavor.
So, the saying goes, “New year, new me.” Well, I find myself conflicted with this for a couple of reasons. 1.) This girl that people are cheering for and complimenting has always been inside. So, this isn’t a new me. It’s still me, just the 2.0 version. 2.) You don’t need a national holiday to make changes in your life. All you need is you, big beautiful you.
xoxo chica rosita